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December 23, 2005
I has finally figured out Christmas
I has to a lot of thinking to figure this out but, of course I has figured it all out.
It is a reason to give me lots of toys!
This is a very good thing. It is! It makes me happy! And making me happy is very good cause when I is happy then I is a very good dog, sometimes I is anyway.
Some of you are probably saying "Oh, Shelby! Christmas isn't a time to give JUST YOU presents!"
Then just look at this.
Have you ever seen so much stuff?!?
There can't be anymore toys and cookies left in the world!
I had a hard time figuring out the trees. They has lights and things. Then cause I is so smart I has figured it out. They is there to protect all the toys!
I bet they is a monster in there who will come down and bites you if you try to steal them! David says no, that it am pretty lights like stars in the sky and they is all colors. I DON'T KNOW WHAT COLORS IS!
I also can't have any cookies or toys until Christmas. I don't think David is being mean so there must be something important going on here I hasn't figured out yet.
Two things made me feel kind of sad. First even though I is a hard working dog I has no money! I can'ts send Jimmy and Ben and Robin and Gramma and Ballou presents back! That makes a good dog feel a little sad.
Then I is sad cause even though I am the greatest dog in the world and no one deserves all these presents more than me I gets to thinking about them dogs around here that gots no stupid David to pet them and feed them. Some of them got no home!
I consulted with my colleague, Doctor Karen about this. That am Doctor talk for "I asked her a question."
She says I could give EXTRA toys and things to a Dog Shelter right near where I lives.
Now I will have to wait until Christmas to see if I really has anything EXTRA but if I do I am going to give it to the dogs who am even poorer than me!
Doctor Karen also says I weighs 45.3 pounds and that I carries it beautifully! SHE SAYS MY BUTT IS PERFECT SIZE! And my health is perfect. I knew this cause I am perfect!
Doctor Karen is going to have a baby. She is not naming her baby Shelby even though that is the greatest name in the world.
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Posted by Shelby at December 23, 2005 4:04 PM